May 22, 2023
A Chaplain’s Thoughts: Loneliness
By Rev. James F. Quigley, O.P. ’60
Associate Chaplain, National Alumni Association
A recent report from the U.S. surgeon general, Vice Admiral Vivek Murthy, claims loneliness is infecting huge sectors of the U.S. population. I’ve seen it in the lives of widows and widowers, single parents, young alums moving to new cities and jobs, the divorced, students who can’t easily “fit in,” the sick, the financially troubled, single women and men. Loneliness is not easy and sometimes can have terrible consequences on the quality of one’s life. What to do?
This chaplain to alumni and alumnae does not have the answers, obviously, but I do have some thoughts. One is that if you are lonely, don’t isolate yourself. That may be more easily said than done, but turning inward may make you odd. Do not focus on rejection, past hurts, envy, and jealousy of others. That will only make you bitter. Decide rather to become a part of others —deliberately reach out to family, friends, roups. If religious, look for a parish. Contact a Providence College regional alumni club. Call Providence College and ask to talk to an understanding, kind Dominican. There are a few here! In other words, talk to someone. Get out of yourself.
Something else: Deepen your spiritual life, or get one. The gospel of John tells us that the risen Lord Jesus Christ wants to be close to us, wants to be part of who we are, won’t walk away from us no matter what. Listen to these words of Jesus speaking to his disciples and to us: “Do not let your hearts be troubled; have faith in God and faith in me … In my Father’s house there are many dwelling places … I am going to prepare a place for you … I will come back and take you to myself so that where I am you may be also.” Comforting words! They tell us, Jesus tells us, we are never really alone. “I am your way, your truth, your life.” Something to believe in!
